Taking time off
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Yesterday class ended at around 3pm. Instead of going back home to study for upcoming exams, I took the time off and tagged along with Friend A while she search for a birthday present. What inspired me for this post is not the process of searching but the 1 hour plus that we used to eat and talk in BK.
I have always been afraid. Afraid of losing myself while growing up. Losing what I first start off with. During each stage, I have always tried to evaluate myself on what I have lost during the stages. Sometimes, when a person keep focusing on an objective, they will change. They will forget the things that they really want. The changes may be drastic or insignificant. I know changes are inevitable. I have always known that. But I always hoped that I will not change too much such that friends wil feel that I am becoming a stranger. Up till now, I have achieved that. I am still the same person. The one that I, myself understand. However, I cannot guarantee that I can control the changes in me - my character. So, this post will be a reminder to me of who I am. If I really changed a lot, please scold me and bash me up.
My family matters to me. My close friends matters to me too.
Finding, finding, found ....
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Have you ever had the experience of losing something that was in your hand a minute ago? Yesterday, I had this experience. I was holding on to my ruler, drawing lines and the next moment, "poof" the ruler disappeared. I serched high and low for the ruler and even engaged my grandma to help me flip through my books in case the ruler was slotted in between the pages. But the ruler was not to be found. I flipped over the sofa and still, the ruler was missing. I gave up and went to bathe while my grandma continue to help me flip the books =D In the end, after I came out, I decided to re-search the ruler. To my astonishment, the ruler droped into the casing of the sofa cushion. Waste my time searching high and low for it. So the moral of this story is, always put your stationary in your pencil box.
HAHAHA.
Emo-ing ... For what
Sunday, November 8, 2009
I think this is the time of the day where there is nothing happening but still you will feel like emo-ing. Well, today's topic of the day is friends. I think I have written this ages ago which I have deleted. I think the content will be a little different.
I learnt from a MPW class that to persuade people, there is the principle of reciprocity. I think this is the same for friendship. If you think that Friend A is your best friend but Friend A thinks that Friend B is her best friend then Friend A is not your best friend. Well, some people may think otherwise but I feel that this is rather true. For me, best friend equals to the friend whom you will first think of when anything happens and the one whom you will look for when you have troubles. If you always look for Friend A when you have personal problems or troubles but Friend A has never or seldom turns to you when he/she have personal problems or troubles then there is no meaning in it. So with that definition, I conclude that I don't have best friend. I think I can safely say that other than studies wise or computer based questions or other advice questions, very little people will think of me as their first person to turn to when they have problems (of course family excluded). Sounds quite pathetic but this has always been the case since secondary school days or maybe in the late primary school days. I think this is not a fault of anyone but me because I am more of a listener than a talker. I don't ask people a lot of questions unless necessary and I think that if someone wants me to know certain information, they will tell me automatically. And even when they tell me, sometimes I have no idea how to react. Of course, if someone can answer all the questions below then I think that person is the one whom I always turn to when I have problems.
1. What is the most embarassing situation that I have come across in my kindergarden years
2. What primary school did I come from?
3. What is the one thing that happen during primary school that I will always come to regret?
4. What is the name of my family members?
5. Have you seen a picture of me during primary school days?
Even though I may not have a best friend, I can't deny the fact that I have several close friends and some, we try to keep in touch every month. Close friends are easier to find because after several years of studying together, you will automatically know the person's likes and dislikes. Even after that when you seldom see each other, once you gather together, you will know how to react to the actions that your friend takes. Also, there will not be any awkwardness when you meet, even after a long time.
Good friends are of course after close friends. Well, I have some good friends whom I have worked with. They are people who are good to talk to. But you will only turn to them when you have problems that are not so personal. They may be good friends now but you will never know whether after a long time apart, will you still be good friends or not. But the main thing is to enjoy now and not to think about next time.
I have many friends. The normal kind where you just talk about the weather and all but never on in-depth problems. These people normally have conversation gap with you. For me, when I am with normal friends, I will be afraid that when stop talking, there will be awkwardness in the air.
So, I am done with this piece of long and some emo-ing ranting. By the way, I am taking a mod on Doing Business in China (in Mandarin). I think that I should start writing in Chinese instead. But it will take maybe an hour or so to type out. Not that I want this mod... I think I can survive.
